All I Want for Christmas
My husband asked me over the weekend what I wanted for Christmas. I hemmed and hawed, scratched my head, and came up empty. I did what I sometimes do when caught off-guard, I began thinking out loud. Sadly, I described everything I didn't want. I could tell he was quickly losing interest in the conversation, if that's what you can call a one sided dialogue of me wracking my brain to come up with what I might like to find (or not) under the tree this year.
I considered the typical things like perfume, jewelry, a massage (this did wrestle for my attention for a brief moment), but nothing really jumped out and captured my interest. "Honestly, I can't think of a single thing that I just have to have,” I said. Then I wondered, is my holiday spirit MIA this year? I hate it when that happens.
Over the past few years, I have found myself getting less excited about baking, candy making, Christmas letters, and loading up the Christmas tree with brightly wrapped gifts. I worry sometimes that I have slid into the bah-hum-bug category of people. For years now I have been telling my husband that what I want to create this Christmas is simple, quiet-time, to sit by the fire and read a book to the sound of Johnny Mathis singing I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas on the stereo. And every year, though I have gradually shed many of the crazy Christmas trappings, it still somewhat eludes me.
This year my feelings about Christmas are heavily impacted by reading in the paper that unemployment is over 10% (and we all know it is much higher than that when you count all the folks that are underemployed or have just given up!), or that our national debt is going up another half a trillion dollars, or that it is becoming increasingly more difficult for the middle class to have access to a college education, or even medical insurance. It makes it hard to want to be frivolous when so many people are struggling. Some would say we can fix it if we spend, spend, spend, but my heart just isn't in it.
What do I want for Christmas this year? The obvious of course, I want Peace on Earth but we all know the only way I can have that is if I find it within my own heart. I want my daughter to have a healthy and easy delivery of my new granddaughter in early 2011. I want BJ’s knee to heal completely so he can get back to doing what he loves, playing soccer. I want my husband to feel strong and capable again, after the loss he experienced this year. I want...I want...I want.
And then earlier today I read on page 94 in the December edition of Fast Company about a $25 gift idea. It is called the "No Mo" Chemo party and it is given to celebrate the completion of one of the young patient's chemotherapy at St. Jude Children's research hospital. And then I knew exactly what I wanted. I want to give a "No Mo" chemo party. I want to celebrate life this Christmas! I want to dance, and love, and rejoice in hope. And I want to help a deserving child at St. Jude Hospital celebrate too.
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